Parents are dorks. Ok maybe that is a bit of a generalization. MY parents are dorks. Let’s start with my Mother. She recently bought a Shake Weight. Yep. She also received a “fake” butt for Christmas, and has, over the past year, become completely obsessed with dogs and cats. Her house is filled with motivational sayings and plaques. Her front yard is filled with a very random assortment of lawn ornaments. I bought them all for her. It’s this streak in me that knows my Mom will feel like she HAS to put the lawn ornaments out no matter how incredibly horrible they are. She would feel bad if I came over and they were not there. I admittedly use that knowledge to my advantage and find the most hideous lawn ornaments possible. I do believe she is starting to catch on…
I have talked about my mom and our somewhat complicated relationship in the past. However, I have rarely mentioned my Dad. So what about him?
He makes my mom look AWESOME, LOL! See, I love my Dad. He is a total goofball. If you are my friend on Facebook, you may have seen his posts. No, he cannot spell. Yes, he types in all capital letters, not because he is yelling but because he cannot see. “LEAVEING MONDAY DEER NEXT EAT MY ARROW” is a typical status of his. (Yes, I did just copy and paste that.) He breeds chihuahuas. He has a chihuahua named Bear and a Chihuahua named Peanut. They had a puppy. It’s name is Beanut. That is just how my Dad rolls. Oh and he gives his chihuahuas mo-hawks.
You might be picturing in your head a typical stereotype father. Well replace that with a little Mexican man, in snake boots, a cowboy hat and a DENIM EXPLOSION! (Yes, that is denim jeans, denim shirt, and denim jacket.) …that’s my dad!
So those are my parents, I got to thinking about them and wondering if I would ever be like…that. It happened while I was looking for something to wear in my dresser and instead I found 3 big boxes of candy. My secret stash! I have no idea when I got this candy or why I hid it. It is just something I do. It is something my Dad does. He hides candy everywhere! Under the couch cushion, in the bathroom, in the car, in the freezer, everywhere! He used to go to the store just to get more “N-R-N-R-P.” What the hell is N-R-N-R-P? Yeah, I used to wonder that as well. N-R-N-R-P is code for candy. He couldn’t just say “I am going to go to the store to get some candy.” because then he would have 4 kids begging to come with and get some for themselves. I remember him saying N-R-N-R-P and me trying to figure out what the heck he was spelling or what each letter stood for. I eventually realized it meant candy but that took years!
As an adult I don’t really view my parents the same way I did when I was younger. My parents are just people, very odd people, but people just the same. I do not think I will follow in their footsteps and live they way they live, however, I do believe that over time I will pick up some of their “dorkyness.” (That is, if I already haven’t…) My parents can still teach me things despite the fact that I am 25. My dad goes hunting and uses a bow. How cool is that!? I would love to learn how to do that. My mom, umm, well I honestly can’t think of anything could could teach me. I suppose you could say she has made a lot of mistakes in her life and I have defiantly learned from them. I know what I do not want to become and that is thanks to her. That sounds harsh, but I believe even she would agree.
So I ask you, are your parents dorks? They say we turn into our parents, do you see that happening to you? Are you already a dorky parent?
*looks at her hidden candy and her awesome lawn gnome*
…oh crap.
